Stress. In writing.

Will my life ever be the same? who knows. Joey left last Thursday to move to New Orleans, he found a job there. If everything works out alright I will be down there with him in a few months. I pray every night that he has finally grown up and we will be OK. So things are going good so far. He left on Thursday got there late Friday night and he started working on Monday. He calls me every night, and I miss him so much. This last week has been absolute hell. But I am sure there will be more of those to come.
It is so hard living here at my moms house. I always feel in the way. And I feel like the kids can't be kids. This house is just too small. You really can't do your own thing without getting in someones way. So usually I get off work and go to my friend Samantha's house to just hang out. her and her family have been so good to me. My kids can play and be loud and make a mess without me having to worry about who it will "offend" i guess is the right word. Sometimes i stay over there a little too late but Samantha and I get to talking and I think that it will take a nuclear bomb going off to shut us up. She will talk to me about anything no matter what it is. Sometimes I just really need that.
Our Easter was good, it was hard not having Joey here with us. But I got through it. Our anniversary is coming up on the 24th and I am scared about being alone for it. He has already missed so much of the kids funny stuff in the last week I hate for him to miss so much more. Hayes starting grabbing his feet and really reaching for stuff. He is growing so fast. Time is just flying by. I miss my life. I wonder why things ever fell apart.

Too Cute!

Hayes is such a sweet little boy. He just looks so thoughtful in this picture that I had to share it. I can't believe that he is already 4 monthes old. Time just goes by so fast.

Thank You

Thank you Nick and Meri for your comments. It is nice to know that I am loved. It may not seem like much to type a few words to make some one feel better but they hit me hard. I am so glad to have people in my life that take the time to tell me how much they love me. I need you both in my life so much. Thank you for being my sisters and my friends. And know that even though at the moment my life is crazy and hectic I will always be there for each ot you. Love ya.
Love,
Lacey

Stupid Me.

Do you ever get the feeling that nothing is ever going to go right in your life again? I am sure everyone does. This whole past year has been a literal hell for me (with a few high points). I had to leave my husband because he lacked the Love or motivation or something and just wouldn't work. Stupid me. I thought he would come running back as fast as he could scrambling to get our lives back together. Stupid me. He is taking his time. He lives somewhere else and I live with my mother. Stupid me. He gets to play Dad whenever he wants and gets to go home to enjoy not having to worry about four other people while I am a full time mom and am working full time to boot just to afford to live at my moms house. Stupid me. I had to buy diapers with quarters the other day. Stupid me. I am worth more than that. I know I am. But how do I make the Love of my life Love me back? Stupid me. There were times when we were together that I wasn't sure where we were going to be the next day, and I never want to go through that again. Why does Love make us so stupid? Why do I still care about him? Why do I still want to be with him? Why can't I just let it go and start over? Because of Love? Stupid Stupid Love? Well then I HATE Love. It makes me Stupid. Stupid me. And Then .................................................................................... I Love, Love. I Love, Loving my family, my friends, my wonderful Loving children. I Love how they Love me. I Love seeing old friends with their new children, and somewhere inside me even though I don't know them a tiny piece of me Loves them. I think I have taken Love and turned it into my enemy. I have always loved to freely, too whole heartedly and it has done nothing but slap me in the face and beat me down and leave me for dead. I wish my heart could stop loving, so no one or nothing could destroy me. I am beginning to sound like a crazy person. But all of you who are reading this that know me, know that I am crazy. So basically this whole blog tonight is to state the fact that I Love and Hate Love and I am crazy. Done, nuff said. Goodnight.

Hayes Joseph Greco

Well as soon as my doctor said it was safe for me to have the baby, all my preterm labor stopped. typical. But Hayes Joseph Greco finially came on November 8th 2008 at 4:38 in the morning. He weighed 7 lbs 2 oz and was 19 inches long. He has so much hair! I love it.

He will be 4 weeks old tomorrow. I can't believe how fast time has gone. He has already outgrown some clothes. But he is the best babyt although he is a little spoiled. Ty Loves him so much. Every morning he asks about his baby "bruver" and then talks about how cute he is. Irelyn thought he was a doll at first and now she could just care less.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

Still no baby. I can't believe it. But we had a good Halloween. I took the kids to the mayors walk at the rec center. And with the help of my sister and brother-in-law we had a good time. The kids didn't fit into their tigger and eyore costumes so Irelyn went as a bumble bee and Ty rode a chicken. Everyone loved Ty's costume he looked so dang cute. Irie was a little overwhelmed with the whole thing the only thing that she would say was thank you when they gave her candy. Then after the mayors walk we went to our church Halloween party and had a lot of fun. The kids got so many prizes and I decorated a cute cake. So did my sister.

WOW!!!!!!! It has been so long since I have blogged. I am almost at the end of my pregnancy now. Its a boy. I no longer live in Tooele I am back in Vernal and currently living with my parents because rent is so darn expensive. The baby is due in a couple of weeks. That is if he can wait that long.
I am so excited for Halloween. I love dressing the kids up and carving Pumpkins. This year they are going to be Eyore and Tigger. We got our pumpkins yesterday out in Naples. They were a heck of a lot cheaper than Wal-Mart who wanted $5.00 a pumpkin we got 6 pumpkins for $9.00. We haven't carved them yet but I did get some cute pics of Ty and Irie with them today on the porch. The pumpkin patch was funny there was no one around to pay instead they had a big 55 gallon barrel with a hole in the side that said please pay here. They must be very trusting people. I will try and keep up with my blog a little more than I have been life just got pretty hectic there for a while.